I had A DAY this week. It’s school vacation week, so we aren’t on our normal routine, plus my husband had to travel for work. I was able to sign Reece up for art camp Friday while Kat was in daycare, so all week I was looking forward to getting a little time to myself where I could relax. What ended up happening was an epic Mom Fail.
We decided last week we would finally pull the trigger on adopting a new cat. Tuesday morning we headed over to a shelter. Based on the feedback of the shelter we picked Shadow. A black one year old cat whose notes said: familiar with children, playful and likes to sit on laps.
The first day we took him home Kat was terrified. Any time Shadow took a step in her direction she would shriek and panic. She warmed up quickly, by Friday morning she was hugging and kissing Shadow and insisting on saying goodbye any time we shut him back in “his” room.
Friday morning the irrigation company came by to turn on the sprinklers. I shut Shadow in the room, then dropped the kids off at daycare and camp (school vacation week). When I came back I let Shadow out of the room to explore kid-free, showered and started doing laundry. The irrigation guy knocked on the door before leaving to tell me a few things and then I sat down for what felt like the first time all week.
I went to shut Shadow back in his room before picking Reece up from morning camp, but he didn’t run up to me when I called out for him. Trust me, that’s strange for this cat. I walked around the house calling him looking under and behind furniture. Then it hit me. That moment when the irrigation company knocked on the door. He must have gotten out! After 10 minutes of looking around outside and in the house, panicking, calling my husband crying, then calming down, I had to get Reece since I was already pretty late.
Tiny Broken Hearts
As soon as I picked Reece up he started talking about how he couldn’t wait to see Shadow and how much he missed Shadow. I explained to him that the cat got outside and was exploring, since he was a kitten he got a little turned around and was having a hard time finding his way home but was trying very hard to find us. Somehow, Reece did not cry, but he was very sad. We went for a long walk around the neighborhood where Reece told me he missed Shadow, the neighborhood is very big, it was taking forever to find Shadow. When we picked Kat up from daycare, Reece immediately notified her that Shadow was outside because “Mama let him out.” Thanks kid. Kat said, “Oh yeah. OK. I can’t wait to see Shadow.” Great.
We got home and there was mostly crying from Kat because she wanted to see Shadow. At 6:30 we headed upstairs for the bedtime routine. There was a lot of sadness about Shadow. Reece used the bathroom and started brushing his teeth, Kat and I went to her room to pick out pajamas and hear a meow!!! Thank the Lord!!
He was shut in her closet all day and didn’t say a peep. That moment when I was doing laundry I put bedding into Kat’s closet, he must have gone exploring. Then I went back to the laundry room to grab towels and on my way to the bathroom had shut Kat’s closet without a thought. This noisy AF cat did not meow or scratch for eight hours! He didn’t pee or poop in there either, another small blessing. There was a lot of hugging and kissing Shadow before I shut him back in “his” room so I could put the kids down for bed.
Losing My Rockstar Mom Cred
Those 8 hours when I thought Shadow was missing were horrible. No husband to come home and help me, my family was unavailable to help me, the kids were clearly upset, and inside I was falling apart because I felt so bad. Unfortunately, since I am the Mom around here it’s up to me to put on the brave face and voice. To be cheerful and calm.
If I didn’t have kids, I would be upset but would not have been half as worked up over the situation. The thing is, I was so worried for my babies, the entire day I was stressed out to the max. I was blaming myself all day. I was the worst mom ever. I had failed my babies and broke their hearts.
I’m glad we had a happy ending and Shadow is safe. Not to be a Carrie Bradshaw, but, I can’t help but think… If he hadn’t been locked in the closet, he would have run out when I got that knock on the door so I got lucky in a way. Being a mom pulls you in so many different directions. Any small distraction can result in a mistake. My mom confidence is shattered to put it lightly.
It was a tough day, and I know there will be more tough days, tougher days even. But when you have a 2 and 4 year old their sadness breaks your heart. I know I will have many more mom fails. I just hope I’m all set for the next couple of years at least.
If you have a similar experience, doesn’t have to be pet related, please share. No judgement here since I feel like the most irresponsible mother in the world this week! #momfail